My One

I absolute love having a girlfriend! Especially one that is so perfect and wonderful and can make me smile and makes me feel special all the time. :) She really is the best thing that has happened to me. I'm getting ready to spend the first Valentine's Day with someone.  I'm a little nervous since I've always been single on Valentine's Day. I don't ever want to let her down. She is my world! It's been five months and we're still going strong so I'm happy and it's getting better every single day!

One Month

So, I'm probably going to be talking about Audrey an awful lot for the foreseeable future.  She is my everything and what makes me want to wake up in the morning and what keeps a smile on my face during the day.  I love her and I hope she loves me as much in return. It's been a magical month where I've gotten to know an absolutely amazing person.  I don't know what I'd do without her in my life or how I managed to get by without her. I never ever want to lose her!

Audrey

So I'm finally in a relationship! I'm so very excited and happy. Everything seems to be going better and smoother and I have a better outlook on the world, and it's all due to Audrey.  She is amazing.  I'm so giddy almost all the time and more so as soon as I see her. What a wonderful time I'm having!

New phone finally!

I finally have a new phone. No more 20 minute battery life and broken touch screen. Now I have the king of phones, the iPhone, and am loving this litle handheld piece of cutting edge technology!

Finals

The most un-enjoyable week of each college semester is now the next week of my life.  Yes, it is finals week.  I am stressing out over the amount of review I need to get done so I can feel completely comfortable about all my finals.  Luckily, two of my classes aren't really having a final exam, and two more of them I already feel fairly comfortable about.  Unfortunately, that still leaves two classes that are giving me a migraine.  Especially my Trig class.  Oh well, it will all be over soon enough.

Vision

So, I've recently had to start wearing my glasses around.  I personally think that they make me look like a dork, but I think I'm finally getting used to them.  Less people talk to me this way, but that's okay too, I prefer to be on my own.  Most days at least.  I really want contacts, but don't have money to get them and I need a new pair of glasses cause these are the ones I got in high school and I must have grown since then or something cause they are almost too small.  It's nice to be able to see again, but I really hope that I don't have to keep wearing them much longer.  My vision is one of those bitter-sweet things I guess.

The Opposite Sex

I have officially decided that I will never understand the opposite sex.  They say one thing when they mean something drastically opposite.  So when you do what they say they want, you always lose.  On the other hand, the few times you have the guts to do the opposite of what they say, those are the few times that they actually meant it and you lose again.  It's just a lose lose situation.  Girls are confusing.  They always will be.

Computer Problems

So, everything has been great with my new laptop all summer, that is right up until school will be starting back next week and I'll actually be needing it.  I've started getting the "blue screen of death" which is basically a blue screen that comes up to tell you that windows has crashed and will restart.  These occurrences have been getting more and more frequent until they are only about 30 minutes apart.  That doesn't even leave me enough time to use my laptop in one of my classes.  It's all very frustrating and on top of that, the customer supports only suggestion was to run a factory reset on the computer.  What kind of a fix is that?  So now I'm frantically trying to back up all my files so I can do so and see if it gets fixed.  I really don't need a problem like this right now!!!

Adjusting to St. George

As nice as it is to be out on my own and have a place at least somewhat to myself.  The adjustment to the weather here has been the biggest change.  Compared to Apple Valley, St. George runs about 10 to 15 degrees warmer everyday.  That adjustment has been hard.  The now 100+ degree days are very warm, especially when a bike is my only transportation.  The A/C has been on the fritz these last few days as well.  It has to run constantly to keep the temperature inside below 80 degrees, but it has been freezing over lately and has to be turned off for hours at a time during the day to let it unfreeze.  This allows the temperature to spike up to as high as 90 degrees inside which is better than the outside temp, but still very very hot.  A typical day runs about 85 inside and it makes it hard to sleep, especially since it doesn't cool off at night.  This is something that will take a lot of getting used to.

Life Blowing Up In My Face

Well, as I've said before, don't work with family.  It's not a good experience.  Especially when you were warned before hand that this particular individual has not followed through on their word in the past.  You should listen to advice like that and it will keep you out of situations like mine.
Having said that, let me explain what is causing life to blow up in my face.  My uncle who has promised me so many things for coming down to tend his kids for him, doesn't know how to keep his word.  It all started by promising me the master bedroom since they weren't going to be home to use it.  I should have acted on that sign of untrustworthiness, seeing as how I never ended up in that room.  I got crammed in the smallest room in the house and told to stop complaining.  Now that they are moving, he started promising me certain things that would allow me to continue living down here and go on with life.  All of these promises are being broken as well.  First with being able to rent out his house.  That is out the window since he decided to try and sell it instead.  Next, he promised me a vehicle to use for the summer.  Now he is taking that with him, even though he won't ever use it.  He also promised to pay me back for money that I lent him.  This is also not happening, so all in all, I have no place to live, no transportation, i'm out almost 700 dollars that will never get repaid, and he's telling me to stop complaining yet again!  I hope that in the future I have better luck with family and being able to trust them, because this nine month experiment ruined my trust for anyone.

The View From Apple Valley

The drive up to Apple Valley from Hurricane is actually a pretty nice view.  I have never really stopped to notice it until now, so here are some pictures of the beautiful drive.  It does help that there is color back in everything and not just muddy or snowy now.

Stressing Out!

So, I lost my current living arrangements, employment, and vehicle all at the same time!  Can you say WHAT!? So now I'm in a frantic hurry to get a job, find an affordable apartment somewhere and get my old car fixed up enough that it will run.  All that to get accomplished and I only have until the end of May.  On top of that, the semester is ending next week and I have finals to take!  ARRRRGGGGHH!  My stress levels are through the roof and I am irritated easily by anyone and everyone, plus I can't concentrate, which only is making things worse!!!  Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? I can't wait until this is all over and I can look back and laugh at the whole thing.  that will be the day.

Attack Gate

The big gate across the driveway has chosen to become an attack gate recently.  Every time I reach through the gate to undo the latch, it bites me!  I don't know what I ever did to the gate, but it doesn't like me.  My cousins and aunt and uncle are all fine.  The gate leaves them alone, but with me, it attacks!  What's up with that?  We'll see how it feels after I take some wire clippers to it!  Ha ha ha! So much for you attack gate!

On the Hunt

The hunt is frustrating at times.  You spend all your energy and time looking and searching for this thing with minimal luck, and when you do find it, it's usually taken by someone else before you can move in on it.  Everyone needs one and it just doesn't seem like there is enough to go around for everyone.  Of course this thing I'm hunting for it a job.  What a terrible time to be looking for one of those.  No wonder they call it a job hunt.

Working with/for Family

My only suggestion here is don't do it... ever!  You think that because they are family that things will be good and maybe even a bit easier just because you already know who they are.  This could not be farther from the truth.  When looking for job opportunities, never take a job working with/for family as your first choice.  It might be okay as your backup plan, but things just never work out properly because it becomes an awkward situation.  You feel somewhat entitled because you are family, and they are in the predicament of having to try to not play favorites with you.  It all becomes one big mess that is better if it is just avoided at all costs!

Perspective

I've come to realize that perspective is everything.  It doesn't really matter what happens or who it it happens to. The only thing that matters is how you look at the situation and how to respond.  You can make the best out of what you thought was your worst day or experience ever, just by looking at it from a different perspective.  Also, you can ruin a perfectly good day by looking at things negatively.  Perspective truly is everything and we are in complete control of this amazing power.  Use it wisely.

Friends

Friends are an interesting thing. They can lift you up, or bring you down. They can make you laugh, or make you cry. They can be good or bad, big or small, etc. Yet, it is always your friends that you turn to when you need help. Even if you have been disappointed or possibly even hurt by them in the past. Why is that? Why do we rely so much on others, and why do we need them in our lives to feel complete? Is their approval of our lives and choices really going to make a difference in how we look at ourselves? Like I said, friends are an interesting thing.

Making Food

I'm in charge of making sure everyone has dinner here every night. Usually on a night such as this, I would spend some time and make something delicious, such as lasagna, or shake 'n bake chicken, but I'm super tired still from my weekend, so we are having something simple. I can't think of anything that is easier to make than Ramen, so that is what we're having. Plus, I waited too long to start cooking, and we all have to be to the Pinewood Derby in twenty minutes, so quick and easy it is. Even if it doesn't taste the best.

What to do?

So, I currently work for my aunt and uncle as a nanny of sorts while I attend school here in Southern Utah. My three cousins that I tend (Alexis, 14; Valeria, 11; and Leland, 9) are usually pretty good, and we have a lot of fun. All today though, Leland has been throwing a tantrum. I don't know really what to do because I can't physically do anything, and my words don't mean anything because when he gets in one of his moods, only his dad can make him listen, and even that is only sometimes. So tonight, after hearing that I am not wanted here, that I don't know how to do anything, and having things thrown at me repeatedly (all by Leland), I am completely worn out and just don't want to do this anymore. My uncle Marty didn't call me back to deal with the issue for almost two hours and the whole time I was pulling my hair out, trying to stay calm. I hate having a temper, but at least I can keep it under control most of the time. So now here I am as I'm finally getting around to my homework, since I was otherwise occupied all afternoon, and am frustrated with everything and it's throwing off my concentration. Good thing tomorrow is another day, and I can only hope that it will be better.